The 7 Levels of Intimacy in Leading with Jason Jedamski – PMP 326

Will Parker discusses the seven levels of intimacy in leading and the importance of connectedness with guest Jason Jedamski in this weeks episode of PMP.

Jason Jedamski is a 24 year educator who has served schools as a teacher, coach, assistant principal, principal, activities director and school culture coach.  While serving as the activities director of Broken Arrow (OK) High School, Jason ignited a school culture turnaround that …..resulted in the Varsity Brands company recognizing Broken Arrow High School as the Nation’s Most Spirited High School in 2017.  Later that year, Jason began working as a school culture facilitator for school culture expert Phil Boyte and his company Learning for Living, Inc.

In 2020, Jason started Ignite2Unite, LLC, a school culture focused speaking and consulting company.  In 2022, Ignite2Unite acquired the renowned school culture program Breaking Down the Walls from Phil Boyte and Learning for Living, Inc. Jason is a resident of Tulsa, Oklahoma where he lives with his wife Kristin and 12 year old twins. 

This week Will and Jason will be discussing school culture, interpersonal connection, student engagement, and the seven level of intimacy.

I’m excited to talk to you about school culture. Can you share why you believe engagement is the first intervention for working with students?

Dropout intervention summaries show the number 1 resource all students need is family connectedness. The number 2 resource they need is school connectedness. This requires an emotional commitment on the part of educators.

I know you also live by the motto “people before professional.” Why is this an important principle for school leaders in caring for students, staff and communities?

“People before professional” means being intentional about investing time connecting with staff, students, and communities on a personal level. High levels of connectedness boosts school culture and improves relationships between all members of the school community.

What are the 7 levels of intimacy, and how can they apply to the work school leaders do in improving school culture?

Matthew Kelly’s work with 7 Levels of Intimacy include:

  • Cliche
  • Facts
  • Opinions
  • Hopes
  • Feelings
  • Fears
  • Needs

Intimacy means “Into Me You See”. Tiered systems for student support also mean turning the dial to facilitate relationship building among students.

If someone invites you to their school, what will they see as you teach practical ways for engagement with students?

Strategies include teaching students to interact with partners through 5 unique handshakes. Layer these with levels of questions like: 

  • What do you like the most about this school? 
  • What do you like the least? 
  • What are you the most proud of from this school? 
  • What has disappointed you the most here? 

Allow these discussions to facilitate ongoing ideas for growth and improvement. Wrap up these conversations with three questions:

  • What?
  • So What?
  • Now What?

How can listeners stay connected with you or invite you to work with their students or staff?

Follow Jason Jedamski on Twitter @jjedamksi or find him at

Have other questions or interested in coaching on school culture, student engagement, or problem-solving? Reach out to discuss options available at

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William D. Parker
William D. Parker